You will find Part here: https://www.lilacnights.com/post/_love
He/my mother they think love is what they've read in books or seen in movies, as a matter of fact even movies have happy endings… that altruistic great holier than thou “glorified” image of love is nothing but a platitude, it’s not love its an unrealistic, fake warped image of forced selflessness due to extreme selfishness & intransigence from the other side. Its when someone thinks they can treat the other person however they want and they have no responsibility towards them or their feelings because they don't love them so the one who loves will suffer and the society will support that due to this illogical theory where love is "selflessness", misery and eternal suffering. They believe it's the love parents show towards their kids where they are going to bless them when they see them with another person... According to them love is perfection it’s strictness & prim impeccability... I have felt happy for people whom I've liked or even loved whom I've considered my dream or ideal husband for finding someone prettier than me ive been genuinely happy for them but different situations call for different feelings.
Love is not a mistake, not a fault and definitely not a crime… no need to “confess” your feelings, you can express yourself, share them but its not something you should be afraid of, it’s not supposed to be embarrassing… it’s blind, it resides in your soul and therefore it loves the other person’s individuality, that is exactly what makes you so attached to them. You never get tired no matter how exasperating they are and they mean the world to you, you want no one else but them because they become an integral part of your soul (I used to love him like that) Love is also extremely elusive, you won’t find it that easily, it’s the world’s biggest secret, the closest thing we have to magic, it’s like the moon, it keeps growing and then it follows that cycle all over again, even if you think it has diminished, it comes back in full sphere…
I’m feeling lifeless right now and I somehow believe I deserve to die. Please don’t say “If it’s killing your then it’s not love” maybe it’s time to say something more matured, like: Your love is indeed true and you deserve something exactly like that, I wish everyone would’ve loved like this, then we probably wouldn’t have seen you in such a condition, maybe he should have been less insensitive and more realistic, I wish he would’ve seen what you are going through instead of taking advantage of what others are quoting, they are not even in your shoes, I wish he would have been a little less selfish, just because you love him it doesn’t mean you will become a victim of his whims and fancies, of his nonchalant waywardness or his insolence and relentless apathy…
Sometimes we expect too much from people in the name of “true love” We feel like it’s our birthright to be loved enormously and unconditionally, as if we are entitled to it, that we aren’t responsible for any consequences the other person would incur, simply because being in love inevitably invites pain and eternal suffering… Thanks to all those altruistic parables & sermonic quotes or poetries that glorify love and all the pain that it entails, which are written by those who’ve been in bed but never in love, they can highlight how one can connect intimately, they sound more experienced in that arena but they have no idea what love is all about, they’ve turned it into some kind of a warped Elysian concept, something celestial and transcendent… thanks to them, people have started believing “Love” is a crime which needs to be confessed and being in love or more precisely true love gives you the right to treat the other person however you want, it lets you humiliate and insult them, disregard their feelings, tear them apart, punish your “offender” reject or rebuff unapologetically, without giving them a single chance all because “True Love means loving someone without any guarantee” they’ll even sadistically love another person in front of you just to see your heart breaking in front of them simply because “If you love someone you will set them free” They will take whatever it is that you have to offer like gifts, love, terms of endearment, infinite support, etc. and never show any gratitude or appreciation, they won’t even say a mere thank you because “True Love asks for nothing in return” So what’s the real definition of Love? According to me, Love is everything, it is Affection, Altruism & Appreciation, it is Care, Clemency & Respect, it is Tender & Gentle, it is Vulnerable and also Defensive, Exonerative but at the same time Expectant, it is Hopeful and yet despondent… Love does not make a person as Divine as God because no one can reach His level, however it can make that person better than Him, it can make him Emulate God but do you think God would’ve let that happen? He makes sure humans are bound by all kinds of mundanity and earthly desires, their souls aren’t detached from the body and hence, their lives are dominated by their identity more than their individuality… they don’t have an elevated spirit so it’s impossible for them to rise above external factors which influence their feelings, thoughts and actions especially those scathing snide remarks that people give when they treat unrequited love like a taboo or social stigma. No one can love unconditionally or swear to remain alone their whole lives irrespective of their soul, be it an angel or a devil whoever under the human skin will not be able to survive Love & it’s throes… only those who are in their spirit form (without any definitive structure or identity) are completely immune and impervious to it.
Love,
Czar 𝒞𝒵.
Zara Sauleh Twitter @TheBigBadBook
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